The Fictional Rock 'n' Roll Where Are They Now

Little Diddy 'Bout Jack & Diane

Jack and Diane became synonymous with a certain kind of American adolescence, but what became of these emblematic teenagers as they navigated the labyrinthine corridors of adulthood?

Jack remained in Evansville, Indiana, tethered to its fading industrial heartbeat. After high school, he took up a job at the local factory — a place that mirrored the same stifling predictability and decaying promise of a thousand songs. There, among the clanking machines and the whir of conveyor belts, Jack’s youthful vigor slowly dulled, but he privately assembled another dream.

Jack wasn’t interested in the banal tragedies of the American middle class. He took every extra hour of overtime pay offered and did not spend his spare time working a barstool at the Peephole Bar & Grill. His focus narrowed as he vehemently refused to become ensnared in the silent rage of unrealized potential. Promotions were few and far between, and the specter of layoffs loomed large. When the factory finally shuttered, Jack smiled, scratched his head, and with a generous family loan from his Aunt Coleen, he bought the Tastee Freez near the Evansville Zoo. 1987 saw him return impressive profits for a first-year business owner. The Evansville city limits could not contain his plan, however.

Diane, her fun and satisfying 18-month dalliance with Jack behind her, put herself through nursing school while working at the same Tastee Freez Jack would eventually buy. She worked tirelessly, juggling part-time jobs while excelling in her studies. Her nurturing instincts found a perfect outlet in pediatric nursing, where she thrived, becoming a beacon of hope and compassion. Diane moved to Indianapolis, sharing a two-bedroom with her older sister, Stephanie. Diane's determination and her relentless drive carved a path through the chaotic urban landscape.

Diane's life in Indianapolis was frenetic, yet richly fulfilling. When Operations Desert Storm and Desert Shield erupted, Diane weighed her options and chose to enlist, paying homage to her father’s Army service. She graduated from combat medic specialist school at the top of her class, earning a meritorious promotion. As she entered service, the bulk of the conflict was months over, but she found Army service rewarding. On the advice of a supervisor, she took Uncle Sam's cash and applied her prodigious talents toward a Bachelor of Science in Nursing.

While assigned to the 449th Combat Aviation Brigade in Morrisville, North Carolina, Diane graduated with honors from Duke University and accepted a commission as a 2nd Lieutenant in the U.S. Army Nurse Corps. Her life was a testament to the power of resilience and the pursuit of one's true calling, a stark contrast to the small-town confines she left behind.

Jack set his sights on expansion and did exactly that. Tastee Freez moved into Bloomington, Fort Wayne, Indianapolis, and South Bend before the Reagan/Bush era transitioned to the Clinton era. Each new location was a testament to his relentless drive, a refusal to be boxed in by the small-town fate that had claimed so many of his peers. Jack’s entrepreneurial spirit thrived amidst the decaying backdrop of the American Midwest.

Diane’s ascent was meticulous, her life a series of calculated risks and hard-won victories that stood in stark relief against Jack’s more chaotic, yet equally determined, journey. Diane’s timing could not have been more fortuitous. She retired from the Army Nurse Corps in 2021 as a colonel after 30 years of distinguished service. She lives happily with her husband Archie Morris, a veteran of the Royal Naval Medical Service, originally from Newcastle-Upon-Tyne, whom she met in Afghanistan in 2008. Their meeting, in the midst of war, was the stuff of improbable romance — a testament to the unexpected intersections that life often throws our way. They split their time between Southend-on-Sea, England, and Glen Arbor, Michigan. They raise English bulldogs and tulips.

Jack’s path, though less structured, was no less determined. He never married, though he is a devoted father to three children: Diane, Rachel, and Samuel. Jack sold his Tastee Freez holdings to a private investment firm in the aftermath of the economic collapse in 2008, a move that demonstrated a shrewd understanding of market forces, albeit one driven by necessity rather than ambition.

Retired to Traverse City, Michigan, Jack now owns a cherry orchard. His life, replete with the rhythms of nature and the cycles of the seasons, is a testament to resilience and adaptation, his orchard a symbol of rebirth and continuity — a man who, despite the vicissitudes of life, found a way to cultivate something enduring and beautiful.

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